Spiritual Encounter

I know the agony and despair of being held captive by incessant fearful thoughts streaming inside our heads. For more than 45 years I suffered through daily agoraphobia, panic attacks, depression, fears, addictions, and physical and emotional trauma.

Much to my surprise, on an icy December night in 2011, an intense physical, emotional, and spiritual encounter appeared to flip a switch within the brain, body, and mind. Here are the high points of that release:

  • Realization of the belief of being a personal self had fallen away.  The mind seemed to recede a bit and it felt as though at certain times the mind was like a periscope popping up behind my head for navigating.
  • Mostly mind was quiet for several days and nights. Gradually, and yet simultaneously, there was for some weeks an ongoing awakening to the illusion of Anita being a separate person in a world of people, places, and things.
  • Clearly seeing I had lived life only inside my personal thoughts and never considered being anything other than a separate human being.
  • This experience of “no-experience” seemed to rewire the brain and open an edgeless, empty, infinite portal to richer and more loving heart space.
  • Sensations of deep peace and expansive freedom arrived the moment the body, brain, and mind accepted what is appearing this moment while, at the same time, ignoring any habitual chatter arising in the mind.  

Realization and enlightenment are two labels for fully comprehending we are not separate beings as much as we may appear to be.  True Nature, our true identity, is, and has always been, an edgeless, seamless, emptiness appearing as the fullness of life.

Once we deeply explore the nature of time, of existence, and of beingness, we may attempt, with consistent self-inquiry, to peel away all that is untrue…and this may take decades.  For those committed to seeing beyond the tricks and traps of the mind, awakening to the imaginary nature of a separate self may appear.

Ponder the paradox:

  • The nondual teachings of Jesus, the Buddha, and Rumi will make sense to the logical mind only when mind comprehends these writings are pointing to the fiction of a personal self.
  • There has never been a separate you…
  • There is a lasting and strong belief and conviction of being a separate self and claiming the stream of thoughts and beliefs as belonging to a separate and personal you.

This website shines a light on the shocking intellectual, emotional, and psychological journey of waking up to what is.  Some refer to this inward journey as the pathless path as you may eventually understand you are already what you are seeking, and yet the journey seems to be required to grok the illusory nature of the personal self.  Welcome to uncovering a revelatory and expansive freedom!  You can be free of the urge and habit of mentalizing, thinking, and conjuring psychological fears based on a personal and separate you.

Anita
Raleigh, NC

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